I don’t think i had felt so numb in ages.
After the series of “what i’d say to my future daughter” I suddenly felt like there was nothing more to say. And even if there was, i didn’t want to voice it. I wanted to stop being vulnerable and honest, speaking out my opinions and views publicly and dim down the colours to mix in with the grey crowd. Although, instead of grey I actually wore a lot of black. And i felt as sad as i looked.
So here i’ve been for months now, licking my wounds like an injured cat; sleeping, sleeping and sleeping and only leaving the house if i really had to. Last August something ended as quickly and painfully as a heart attack, and it has indeed taken some electric shocks to keep my heart pumping. The year 2014 is racing to its end but i feel like i am only starting to catch up with it again. There’s more light coming in, and I’m sure it’s not just the Christmas decorations. And yes, there will be a cheesy end to this writing, too.
The disgustingly positive conclusion of this all is that the things that don’t kill you will make you stronger. That when you are really down, the only way is up. That God is there and he is good. And most importantly: of every jerk and bad happening I encounter in life, I will write a future hit pop song.